In this time and in our culture, we
hear the phrase “going postal.” This originated from an event
where a postal worker gunned down his manager and others in 1983.
There were also other crazy killings that occurred in post offices in
the US.
These were horrific events. While I do
believe there is no excuse for someone losing control and in a rage
hurting another human being, more and more people in our anonymous
society struggle with helpless feelings of fury when they suffer from
circumstances where life feels unjust and out of control. Today, I
felt just a tinge of this frustration.
My brother passed away about 4 years
ago. He was a sweet man, and he died tragically because of chronic
alcoholism. It happens that I occasionally get mail in his name, and
this causes me a stab of pain. Since this is unpleasant, I have tried
to stop the letters from coming.
One company seems unable to stop
sending him advertisements at my address. Ironically, it is Glo***
Life—a life insurance company. I tried refusing these letters by
writing “deceased” on the envelope and returning them to the post
office. And... the company did not stop sending mail to my house.
Recently, I took the inner application
for life insurance and wrote bluntly in large letters with a black
Sharpie, “Keith is dead; take us off your list.” The result?
Apparently their system is automated, so it does not read anything
people actually write on those applications. I just received their
most recent packet for my deceased brother so he can complete the
second longer application for life insurance. In large orange
letters, the paper does say, “Pending Eligibility,” so I guess
they are safe from him making claim?
Life can make you feel crazy, right?
How do you deal with crazy frustration
over our insane system? One answer is crazy rage. That always ends up
bad. I thought about calling the company above and telling them… well, things I should not have said to an innocent secretary. A safer answer is to de-stress by eating, even though when I did
that, it hurt only me. In days past, I would keep a stash of
chocolate chips in the cupboard. When I was really stressed, that was
my haven. Chocolate is a safe answer and can stop someone from
attempting violence, right? And when it is chocolate and ice-cream
too, well, no problems can really compete, correct?
But now when stress hits, I do try to
stop and use my preplanned safe responses instead of food binging.
Some of my safer de-stressors:
1. I call a friend with whom I have a
pre-made agreement and we get and give encouragement to each other.
2. I work on an ongoing project I enjoy
doing (woodworking, sewing, drawing, singing, painting the walls,
gardening, etc.) and get it out and work on it.
3. I go to the store and buy something
I want (planned purchase) that will distract (but is not too
expensive) new book, gifts for future event..?
4. I pray for people I love and myself
for self-discipline.
5. I exercise, or I just find something
to do where I move my body like go for a walk.
Don't forget, no craziness or rage, even if it involves chocolate:)
